Managerial Communication Writing

In: Business and Management

Submitted By girliegirl521
Words 806
Pages 4
Managerial Communication Writing Exercise

In this exercise I was given two different examples to critique. I will list all my changes below on how I think each of these could be changed to make them better. Example one is feel is written better than example 2 and there seems to be less changes that need to be made. Proof reading your own work and even asking someone else to do it for you can help ensure that your writing piece is professional.

Example 1:

The first part of this example is the header or greeting. This is located in lines 1-6. The order of each line should be like this: who the document is to, and then who the document is from, who the document should be carbon copied to, the subject and then the date. On line six, you can remove the person's name since you have already listed this in the header on line one.
In the first paragraph, the date in line seven should be listed to read June 11-22, 2008. This provides a full and complete date for the recipient. The word not doesn't need to be capitalized in this sentence. If this word should stand out underline would look more professional. Lines 10-13 is the middle paragraph of the document. This paragraph should change the beginning of it to read as this memo is about the addition of Silent Watch to our company systems. Then the next sentence should be changed to read. Inform all employees that they should limit their computer use and e-mail to work projects only and that their work would be monitored. The last paragraph should have a complete date for the probationary period in line 14. Adding the word your on line 15 after the word and but before the word regular can show the ownership of who the pay belongs too. In the last sentence of this memo, on line 16 it should read as this matter as closed. This shows that the person sending this is done with this issue and they are moving…...

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